Rules of the Road

Harsh reality is settling in. Giving up food is not the only rule to monitor on this road to Thinville. Along the way, I am discovering many unexpected cautions, speed limits, and stop signs.

For starters, a caution sign now guards my T.V. Gone are the days of watching mouth-watering comfort foods on Diners, Drive Ins and Dives or tempting European desserts on Everyday Italian. I simply cannot allow the memories of deep fried delicacies and candy confections to invade my brain.

I am skating on thin ice if I accept invitations to join friends for lunch or dinner. Salads are available on most menus, but so are juicy cheeseburgers and raspberry martinis.

My intentions are always honorable, but my mouth doesn’t always choose the menu items that my sensible brain tells it to.

There are Danger signs everywhere when I enter restaurants: delicious smells, attractive entrees on nearby tables,and decadent dessert trays.

When I do begin to eat a meal, I now have speed limits. I've learned to slow down and properly chew my food. Each bite must be small and deliberate. Everything fast about food is wrong. My stomach needs time to realize that it has been fed.

I’ve also found giant stop signs accompany some temptations that I simply have no willpower over. Pizza is beyond the limits of my self-control. It is impossible for me to resist even the worst frozen pizza. The old comparison to sex is true of pizza- even when its bad, it’s still pretty good. When my favorite take out pizza enters our home, I am at its mercy. One piece is never enough. Simply put: Pizza is for me a Do Not Enter Zone.

All in all, the rules of the road must be monitored at all times. The most significant warning on the road is always in the distance-
DANGER: CURVES AHEAD!